Last month, I was shocked by the news of the sudden death of someone whom my family knew very well. He has always been a good person in my eyes, so I was completely surprised to learn that I would not be able to see him again. Thinking about his children even made me feeling sadder. I hoped his children could handle this situation well because I could imagine how scary it would be for them to continue their lives after their father’s death.
Four years ago, my Dad was hospitalized for a week, and throughout that week, I cried on and off. It never crossed my mind that my parents could leave me alone in this world permanently. That one time event has changed my point of view about life and specifically preparing life after someone’s death.
Events, such as serious illness and death are not the things that I specifically receive in school. Thanks to age and maturity, I learned to understand these events wisely. Out of the things that I read and heard from people, getting over the regret feeling is the hardest one. Too often, we do things without thinking of the consequences, only later we regret from not doing it the way we should be. I’ve heard so much from relatives how sorry they were from not taking time to listen and spend time with their loved ones while they were still alive.
This new understanding has then shaped the way I interact with my parents and do my everyday activities. I started to pay attention to my parents’ health and do extra miles in my own way to ease their burden. Of course, we still have disagreements here and there, but I have done at my best to make things better for them, as possible as I could. Likewise, in my own personal life, I learn to not take things too personally. I also learn to always think pros and cons before saying and explaining something to clients. Definitely, I have more things to do while I am still alive, and I try to do each of it with genuine heart. This is because I don’t want to feel bad later on. It is because I understand that life is precious and so I must use it wisely.
Love the life you currently live.
Love the work you do.
Love the people with whom you work with.
Love the people who have been with you through up and down.
Love the God who creates you.
Love the talent that God has been given you with.
Love your body, mind, and health.
Live, love, laugh and give thanks.
Our lifestyles resemble coffee brands.
Our life issues remind us of the sizes of coffee cup that we choose when we drink coffee.
The way we handle the issues is similar to how we drink our coffee. Some like to sip it while it is still hot, fresh brewed. Some like to wait for a few minutes. Others like to drink it cold.
Eventually, each of us will sip and finish drinking our coffee. Life issues may not all gone completely, but it will slowly dissipate just like when we drink our coffee. It takes time.
Thanksgiving, which marks the beginning of the holiday season, always leave me with mixed feeling. This particular mixed feeling has been remained the same from time to time. It’s always the combination of happy because Christmas holiday is approaching and sad because this season reminds me of someone and something I have been wanting so much. Although the memories of past hope and love stay intact, time heals the wounds and disappointments.
This Thanksgiving, I am thankful for the courage and mercy that God has been given to me. I surely could not make it this far without His kindness. It took a big courage to go back on track and build a strong foundation of a new life. I’ve learned that there is a beauty in every imperfect situation. This realization could and will happen when we acknowledge our weaknesses, ask for His guidance, and move forward. Once we move forward, we cannot look back on our past too often because we could forget what our goals are.
We could look back on our past once we achieve at least 80% of our life goals. When we reach that point, we could compare and contrast, and then redefine our life purposes.
Keep spreading the love because our world will remain and stay healthy when each of us share love with others.
Asking a child to choose a mom over a dad or vice versa is like asking someone whether he needs to breathe or not. The child may struggle to answer this type of question because he/she wants both. Similarly, parent could not tell the child something like, “You stay with Dad and I take your brother/sister,” because the child does not want to be separated from his/her siblings. It is understandable that parents face daily challenges, and there are times family life is just tough. Sometimes and perhaps often, children are suffered the most due to tough family life situations, such as divorce, infidelity, poverty, etc. However, it is unwise to put children in difficult position while you as a parent knows that the problem could be solved between husband and wife.
Parenting and marriage are two different topics but are interconnected. When you decide to commit in a marriage, you should aim both for happy marriage and successful parenting. These two topics must be discussed seriously before you say “I do” and after you both say “I do.” It is also important to practice being unselfish because once the child is present in the family, roles and lifestyles need to be adjusted.
I’ve always believed that it is a privilege to be a parent. If you are a parent, I want you to know how precious your job is. Not everyone could become a parent. Some people struggle to have children. Some people either too sick or too old to conceive a child. So, if you are a parent, I want you to treasure your journey. Raising children is exhausted, but it is rewarding. Your children will always remember the time you have spent together because memory is irreplaceable. Therefore, even if a family life is under “turbulence” tries at your best to control the situation in the peaceful way so that they will not get traumatized due to that event. Family is the first and foremost child’s life experience. It shapes child’s personalities which will continue to grow as the child gets older. Family life and every little experience in the family influence how the child sees the world and him/herself. All of these become a foundation in the child’s overall social and emotional development. When the foundation is healthy and solid, the child will grow healthy and thus could become a responsible citizen.
Will you do it?
I love hearing the phrase Give it to God and go to sleep because it teaches me to let go and let God take control of my life.
The phrase is also a reminder that God is our creator and thus, He is the one who has the power to make changes according to His will.
Each of us carries our own “cross.” The word “cross” in this context means problem, worry, or illness. The more problem we have, the heavier our “cross” are. We could try so much, but at the end, we have to let God carry half of or perhaps the entire cross for us. The process of letting God to take control is tough because it demands us to fully trust God. It is easier for us to memorize Our Father prayer than to allow God to guide us.
Little do we know that God could and will do amazing thing for us when we fully surrender to Him.
So, will you give your “cross” to God and let Him handle it on behalf of you?
Parents and children often think differently. What parents want from the child may not be the child’s preference. Likewise, culture also influences how parents raise their children and put expectation on them. All of these get tricky as the child gets older. It will even more challenging when the child grows up in a culture that is different from his/her original culture. Argument or clash could arise because the child has a different point of view from his/her parents. Both sides will argue that they are doing the right things. Both sides want to win.
On another note, children still and should respect their parents even though they have disagreement over things. This is tough, but children must continue to exercise putting effort to adjust and negotiate with their parents in order to reduce argument. Family relationship is complicated and tough. It takes everyone’s effort to maintain equilibrium.
Life is good when one could manage both family and work life in the most neutral and healthy ways. Can you do it?